Not exactly how I imagined 25

They say that if you want to hear God laugh, tell Him your plans.

And I'm quite sure I heard Him laugh last Sunday.

That day, while riding with Dad and Grandpa to my cousin's confirmation (it's such a blessing to have family so close), it hit me.

There are certain times when life slows down for a bit, and my mind wanders and reflects. It reflects over what I've done, what I'm doing, where I'm going, what I've learned, and what I could potentially do with all of that knowledge.

I deeply thank God for knowledge, experience, and learning. Those are the best things I could ever ask for.

That day as I rode in the front seat of the car on the way to Battle Creek, Neb., I reflected - on who I was with, where we were going and why, and simply how blessed I am.

My mind also strayed to my age.

I just turned 25 a month ago (exactly one month from tomorrow), and I can honestly say this is the first year ever that I have forgotten my age. I think I'm still 24 or even 23 or 22. That's about the age I feel - lower 20's.

I think that in my mind I am not yet 25 because this is not how I imagined 25 would be for me. Ten years ago I'd have told you that I'd be married at 25 for sure, maybe even with kids. I would have told you I'd live in a city, working for a big-time magazine. I also figured I'd be done with athletics, and certainly not running daily.

Now I am 25, and none of that describes my life right now. I am not married, I do not have kids, and I'm living in the very same rural town I grew up in. I'm running almost daily and play volleyball and basketball weekly - with people I never thought I'd meet, considering how shy I was at 15.

Last Sunday, I caught myself slightly wishing a few of my 15-year-old dreams were true. And that's when I heard God laugh.

I tried to tell Him MY plans, and I'm sure He chuckled and said, "Those are great, Amanda, but you have no idea. You will be blessed even more than you're hoping."

He knew where I'd be at 25. And I know it has to be part of His plan, whatever it is. Maybe His plan is for me to get in some experiences before moving on to the next thing. I never thought I'd be back in Tilden (or T-town, as we used to call it), working alongside people who knew me when I was 2. I have to remind myself that there's got to be some reason I am here, doing what I'm doing. Maybe this is preparing me for a future in which I'll be doing something totally different than what I expected, and I'd certainly welcome that!

And knowing that, knowing that my life is in His hands, gives me more comfort than anything - more than achieving my own goals. Of course, this is not to say my dreams aren't important - they are. But the greatest goal is to live where I'm living. Be who I am. Live in the now. And take each day as it comes and grab opportunities as they are presented. Not dwell on future whereabouts only, but work TODAY to fulfill TOMORROW.

Even just five years ago, I'll admit I was probably a little too preoccupied with the thoughts of where I'd be and what I'd be doing. But today, I'm absolutely content with the alternate way I've taken that has led me to 25. In fact, I'm glad that I'm not in a city. So that is one thing that has changed. I've come to really, really appreciate this place that I grew up in and learned the values I have, and the beauty of simple rural life.

I'm ABSOLUTELY ECSTATIC about the experiences I've had so far, and each and every person that I've met so far. I can say without a doubt I've learned something valuable from EACH AND EVERY PERSON I'VE MET. You'd be surprised what I've learned from YOU (if you know me in some way).

So maybe I haven't fulfilled the objectives on my 15-year-old list, but I have things that are much more valuable - lessons of life, which I believe will help me fulfill that list in a much more meaningful way.

I used to think more in terms of checking off the boxes of that list, and now I'd rather have them carefully and meaningfully fulfilled.

Though I do very much want my own family, if for some reason that's not in the plan for me, I will be content - content as long as I'm fulfilling a greater purpose.

If nothing else, if no other dream comes true, if there's some way I can share my experiences and lessons I've learned, I will be happy. Whether that means becoming a teacher, a mentor, a writer, a photographer, or simply an awesome aunt, that's what I desire most - bringing joy to at least one person, if not more. Making someone happier or feel loved. That's what I want to do.